How did we get here?

Mojo is a funny thing. Sometimes I have so much of it overspills out of my pores. Sometimes I have none at all and all I want to do is lay in my room in the dark and not do anything. That’s how I’ve been feeling lately, mainly due to external forces but partly my own doing, as well. 

But here I am, writing a post after what seems like a lifetime. How is everyone? What have I missed? I’ll be attempting to catch up with the blogosphere once this is posted. It’s not that I haven’t missed the blogosphere, it’s just that I got to a point where I couldn’t bear to do anything. All I wanted to do was watch TV (mostly Steven Universe) and eat a lot of crap.

My writing has suffered so badly because of this. I haven’t written properly in months; not even a smidgen. Camp NaNoWriMo is next month, so I will be attempting that in order to get my creative juices flowing.

It’s been hard, people. I cannot lie. Even writing this now requires a lot of effort from me but the thing is I do want to do it – I just have no energy. I have been drained. It’s so weird. I’m slowly getting back to my old self, though. It had gotten to a point where people at work were starting to notice that I wasn’t myself but slowly but surely. I’ll be fine. Self-care is so important.

So, where do we go from here?

Blog Revamp ✨

As I’m sure you’ve noticed I have a new blog layout! It’s nothing fancy and if you’ve followed me for a long time, then I’m sure you know I love a minimal design. But seeing as I’m trying to creep back into the blogosphere, I thought I might as well come back with a new look. 

Writing 🖊️

As I mentioned, I’ll be attempting Camp NaNoWriMo next month. I really want to make some headway on my book. I have 50k+ words down already, for God’s sake. I hate myself for being such a procrastinator and I know the book will not be written by itself. I’m doing some brainstorming and coming up with some new ideas. I’m refusing to go back and touch what’s already been written because I know I’ll get sucked into a black hole and never come out to actually continue the story.

I’ll also be making a conscious effort to post more on the blog and my portfolio. There was once a time that I could churn out 3 blog posts in a day and nowadays it takes me a whole day just to think of half a post. That needs to change. Writing has always been my first love, and need to keep nurturing that if I want to get anywhere in life.

Reading 📚

I’m the sort of person who reads about 50 gagillion books at the same time. At the moment I’m reading:

  • This Is How You Lose Her by Junot Díaz
  • Why I’m No Longer Talking to White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge
  • The Waste Lands by Stephen King
  • How to Be a Bawse: A Guide to Conquering Life by Lilly Singh
  • Altered Carbon by Richard Morgan

I also still have a summer reading list from like 2015 that I have yet to complete. To be a bookworm. If you have any other suggestions for new reads, though, my inbox is always open. 😬

Fitness Journey ⛹🏽

I attempt one every year and it always fizzles out, but I’m trying really hard this year guys. I’ve been to the gym more frequently with Mutay and it’s been amazing. I’ve found I don’t have to post every time I go to the gym just to hold myself accountable. Not everyday social media. Do the #gainz for yourself, right? Been busting that 4.4L of water every day – my skin is a lot clearer than it used to be, although not the best. I think it’s because I love alcohol too much, but irrelevant.

Self Care 💆

I’ve realised that self-care doesn’t mean locking yourself in your room and wallowing in self-pity. Actually, I knew that already and I’ve written before about what to do to cultivate positivity. I must confess that I sometimes don’t listen to my own advice. Have you ever found that it’s so much easier to give other people advice, but when it comes to listening to yourself it is so much harder? Television is so cathartic for me. It is my greatest escape tool and I will always default to it when nothing else works. I’ve been listening to podcasts and music. Simple pamper sessions: sheet mask, painting my nails, bubble bath, Netflix – they do wonders for me. Little, little things to try and get me back on track.

Clear Out 🗑️

The thing I’ve been attempting to do since last year is clear out my wardrobe. There are so many clothes that I own that I know I will never, ever wear again but for some reason, I’m still hanging onto them. I keep telling myself that on my days off, I’ll start my clear out but I never do. I have no idea how I’m going to get around to it, I just know that I need to. Especially as I basically just wear the same clothes everyday, anyway. It’ll be so refreshing, as well.

That’s where I’m going from now on. You know that song by Miley Cyrus? The Climb.

There’s always gonna be another mountain
I’m always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose
Ain’t about how fast I get there
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

Hot damn. Deuces, for now. ✌️

 

It’s been a long time since I’ve put my blog on an official hiatus, but here it is. So much has been going on these past few weeks and I’m not in the right state of mind to be writing or making good content. I’ll be taking a breather because everyone needs a breather. I’m not sure when I’ll return, but I will be lurking around still reading people’s blogs. Ciao for now.

TL;DR – I’m tired, guys.

Contrary to popular belief, I have not stumbled down a rabbit hole and disappeared off to Wonderland (although, that would be lovely). No, alas, I have just been procrastinating with my blogging, again, and as such the Leibster award post is still to be posted.

Am sorry, but not really.

So… Christmas season. It’s meant to be full of joy and warmth, and it is but it also comes with an ounce of stress. The stress of buying Christmas presents, wondering where the feck 2014 went?

This has been on my mind for the past week… Where has 2014 gone? I could have sworn that it was only yesterday when I went on holiday to Barcelona, but that was in June! Man. I wanted to set some 2015 goals, but the only thing that I really want to achieve in 2015 is travelling.

If anything, I really want to achieve this:

In all seriousness, I have some pretty big travelling plans coming up in 2015. You’ll have to keep an eye on the blog, if any of you still even read this.

This past year has been up and down with mostly ups, I’m glad to say. The scramble to get up the last post of the year is real! I really hope that I’ll be able to blog more in the upcoming month – I have missed it, I’m not going to lie.

It’s just that with nothing exciting happening, I don’t really see the point in forcing a post. I’m pretty sure you can just follow me on Twitter if you want to know more about my mundane life (it still includes watching way too much TV).

I also need to revise my writing goals for 2015. I really need to crack my knuckles and get to it because I haven’t written anything properly in ages. As I mentioned in a previous post, I would love to do a postgraduate degree in Creative Writing, so I really need to brush up on my skills and start creating a portfolio of some sort.

So much to do, so little time.

I hope all my fellow bloggers had a merry Christmas or if you don’t celebrate, then happy holidays.

Here’s looking forward and wishing the best of luck for the New Year. God knows I need it.

Guess what day it is, today? Huuuuump day.

Since yesterday I’ve been having some trouble accessing my blog, but I’m pretty sure it’s purely a thing on my end. I have no idea how to fix it but I definitely know my blog is still working because other people can access it. Anyway, no harm done because I managed to access my blog via a proxy site. A tad bit annoying but when you need to blog, you need to blog 😛 I’ll see if there’s anything I can do soon.

It’s getting colder and colder over here in the UK which means that I have to put away my crop tops (Yes, I was still wearing crop tops in October/November. I’m a rebel) and bring out my boots and thick jacket again. Perhaps it’s a British thing, but I complain when it’s hot and I complain when it’s cold. You can never please me. I finally managed to retrieve the massive cardigan my sister thieved from me time ago. I clearly want to get into the Christmas spirit already because the cardigan has reindeers on it.

I can already see quite a few people are already getting into the Christmas spirit, and I must admit the more I read these blogs and watch the Christmas adverts, the more I get excited. I’m also doing Secret Santa this year and have an excellent idea for a present which I’ll probably share with you guys in the upcoming weeks 🙂

I was also thinking of doing ‘No Extension Week’ in which I don’t wear my hair extensions for a week. I am notoriously self-conscious about my hair and hate that it’s short. However, it’s been growing a bit now and the ends aren’t as uneven as they used to be. I mentioned in this post that I used to have alopecia which is one of the reason I can’t do much with my hair because I still have several bald patches. Kind of annoying when I see all these cute hairstyles that I’d think would suit me. It’s also why I wear hair extensions – they not only add length/volume to my hair but also cover up my patches considerably.

hair

However, clipping and unclipping extensions everyday is starting to become a bit tedious and I often find I get headaches at the end of the day. Not sure if it is too do with that, but I wouldn’t put it past it. Anyways, what do you guys think about it?

I recently started watching ‘Boys Before Flowers’, so I’m dedicating my Woman Crush Wednesday (#WCW) to the character Geum Jan Di. Although she can piss me right off with some of the things she does in the show, I have to admit I love her feistiness and the way she smacks the sh*t of the guy who’s cheating on her best friend. Also, she doesn’t take no sh*t from Gun Jun Pyo, which, you know generally goes down well in my books. You shouldn’t take sh*t from ANY guy. Power to ya!

In light of recent events, I want to take some time of your day to talk about Heart Philippines. Esther first posted about it, and I really want to spread the word. “It’s a relief project for all types of creatives: youtubers, bloggers, musicians, diy-ers, etc.” Despite not being able to be there physically to help we can still come together as one and raise enough money to help those that are in need. My heart and prayers really go out to all the affected families and people.

I’m also linking up with Nicole for this week’s Friends Around The World Blog Hop! You should join too 🙂

Friends Around the World Link Up Blog Hop

I finally managed to get rid of that free host I had which messed up my blog and tried to delete all my files without my consent. I am now with ofblue.org. Happy days.

Happy November, guys. It’s hard to believe that it’s nearly the end of the year already – I could have sworn just yesterday I was still in university… My November has been pretty happy, not going to lie. It was Guy Fawkes Day on Tuesday and I went to see the fireworks with a friend. If you follow me on Instagram then you would have seen the picture/video I took when I went.

Guy Fawkes Night, also known as Guy Fawkes Day, Bonfire Night and Firework Night, is an annual commemoration observed on 5 November, primarily in Great Britain. Its history began with the events of 5 November 1605, when Guy Fawkes, a member of the Gunpowder Plot, was arrested while guarding explosives the plotters had placed beneath the House of Lords. Celebrating the fact that King James I had survived the attempt on his life, people lit bonfires around London, and months later the introduction of the Observance of 5th November Act enforced an annual public day of thanksgiving for the plot’s failure.

I also had a week off from work because my boss has gone on a course in Brighton. I have been working from home but it’s been pretty chill. I love my job. A new intern is starting next Tuesday, so that should be fun. There will be someone in the office to talk to other than my boss. Although it has been a happy start to the month, things are bit rough at home. I don’t usually talk about the on goings in my household but I need a place to rant other than to my best friend.

My dad has been having trouble finding work for a while now, and because he’s a stubborn man, he won’t listen to anyone about trying to get a qualification of some sort because that’s what most employers are looking for (My dad didn’t go to university and barely finished his O-Levels). My mum is pretty much the only one paying bills, and helping my sister and I out (my own personal Wonder Woman) with things we need for school/work.

A couple of months ago my dad managed to get a job at a local college, and everyone was really happy because even though it was minimum wage, he could finally start helping my mum out again. He even said to me that he was going to save up and take the family away on holiday to Jamaica (that’s where he’s from and he hasn’t been since he was young). Then suddenly he lost the job because the people that the employers usually hire came back and they didn’t need my dad anymore. So, it was back to the drawing board.

Except, apparently, it wasn’t. One day my dad came home and said to me, “I’m going on holiday to Barbados,” I looked at him as if he were mad. I reckon he is.

When I told my mum, she was pretty upset. She’s already struggling paying the bills by herself, so to find out that her husband has just decided to go on holiday with money he apparently saved must be pretty fucking difficult. Instead of my dad to be using that so-called money he’s saved to help out with the family, he decides to go on holiday instead. The thing is we recently went on holiday to the Philippines in December – January, so doesn’t that fill the holiday quota for the year?

My granddad was so upset that he shouted at him and started swearing. He makes a rule that he never ever swears, as well, but I guess my dad must have really rattled his cage.

I’m pretty fucking pissed off with my dad too. Me? I can look after myself. My sister, on the other hand, she’s the one who’s still going to school and needs supplies and money for school trips, and clothes, etc. Plus my mum needs help with bills as well! That much is obvious.

Ugh, just thinking about really mind boggles me. You’d think that family would come first instead of pleasure. I think my mum might be kicking my dad out, too.