Public Speaking

UPDATE: My laptop has now been fixed, had to reinstall my whole damn OS and then some. At least I don’t have to use my roomie’s laptop anymore – I hate sharing.

With the biggest headache, I shall start this post. Fuckity, fuck, fuck.

I feel like my whole life has writer’s block. No, wait – that doesn’t even make sense. I mean, I’ve had writer’s block for months now and it started to really grate on my nerves. Partially because my laptop has decided to fuck up and I have to reinstall the OS but I can’t without any Internet and my harddrive’s gone and fucked up as well, so I can’t access any of my old stories, etc. I actually feel like crying because if I don’t get my harddrive fixed I don’t know what I’ll do. A LOT of pictures and memories are on that drive. Fuck me for being a careless bastard.

My writers block temporarily subsided and allowed me to plot out a new story about a bunch of teens who find portals dotted around London, which lead to parallel universes. I’ve already written a couple of pages, and it seems alright so far – I’ll see as I go along and I’ll most likely post a couple chapters on here. I could do with some critique.

I’m going to post about public speaking. What do you think of it? You good at it? Bad? Personally, I am spectacularly crap at public speaking – I stammer, I shake and I turn as red as a tomato and it’s all a disaster really. The reason why I’m posting about it is because I mentioned in a previous post that I have to do a speech in an upcoming class. I am dreading it like no man’s business.

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When it comes to public speaking, if I don’t have to do it, I won’t. Hence why in year 10 when we had a mock speaking exam, I vehemently refused to do it to the point where I actually cried in front of my English class. Some people where like, for fucks sake. They don’t understand how hard it actually is for me to get up there, on my own, and speak in front of a bunch of people even if they are my friends. I don’t know what it is but I’m instantly struck with fear if I even think about stepping onto a platform. I can speak in front of people if I’m in a group, that is absolutely fine – I mean I did drama for about 5 years and had main parts where I had to act by myself but I don’t know that’s different to actually making speech.

I have this churning feeling in my stomach every time I think about the speech that I have to do and I don’t even know what the hell I’m going to say yet either. I might just speak about public speaking? How it’s my worse nightmare and maybe give a few examples? Asdghjkl. That’s sounds ideal but I’ve still got this sinking feeling and it won’t go away. Cause I’m going to try something different and go out there without flashcards and presentations because I ALWAYS hide behind them and look like a total idiot, so as long as I know my basis I’m going to try and wing it. Wish me luck.

I got tagged by Sakura to answer 11 questions, so here goes:

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Rules:

1. You must post these rules.
2. Each person must post 11 things about themselves in their journal.
3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and create eleven new questions for the people you tag to answer.
4. You have to choose 11 people to tag and link them on the post
5. Go to their page and tell them you have tagged him/her.
6. No tag backs.
7. No stuff in the tagging section about “you are tagged if you are reading this.” You legitimately (AKA, really, truly, with all honesty)have to tag 11 people.

What do you think of me? Use 3 descriptive words to describe me. Sweet, fun, caring
Where are you from? United Kingdom, baby!
Do you love blogging? Abso-fucking-lutely
Tshirts or buttoned shirts? Tshirts
Ballet flats or sneakers? (for girls) Sport shoes or sneakers? (for guys) Sneakers. Well, I call them trainers 😉
Sling bag or backpack? Sling bag
Sennheiser or Audio Technica or Dr Dre? Are these headphones? I prefer earphones, but I love Skullcandy headphones
Facebook or Twitter? Twitter!
What is your favourite music group/band? I don’t have just one – at the moment I’m in love with The Lonely Island
What is one thing that you always wanted to try but don’t dare to try? I actually have no clue
What is one thing that you tried but didn’t do well? Probably everything :L

Okay, so honestly I don’t have 11 people to tag and I know the rules say you can’t say “You’re tagged if you’re reading” but I don’t give two flying fucks, so therefore if you are reading this you’re tagged. Congrats.

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Chynna x

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3 Comments

  1. October 25, 2011 / 5:13 pm

    Heeyy 🙂
    In reply to the comment on my blog: I flippin’ know about the spam and I can’t get rid of it. I mean I have captcha or whatever and I have – like – spam agents, (I’m a bit useless with any of this technical jam right about now). It disheartens me every time I come onto the site. “BUY NEW COMPUTER SOFTWARE FOR YOUR WIFE.” No! I don’t have a wife and I my current computer software is perfectly satisfactory! Okay, so that’s a bit muddled, but hey.

    Anywho, concerning public speaking, I know exactly what you’re talking about. I had to do a speaking task for English in year 10 and when it was my turn, stood up in front of – what? – 10 people. Stopped still and couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. Couldn’t do anything. I felt so embarrassed. My first experience of real stage fright. Then when I came off having failed to say anything, cried subtly in my chair. Oh god. But it’s the same with me and everything. I just can’t public speak. I shake violently (literally, every bone in my body spasms). Most of the time, I’ll do it anyway, but it’ll be a load of rubbish and I’ll usually get a ‘sympathy clap’ at the end. Urk.

    I find writer’s block comes conveniently when I have deadlines in my writing. I need to write 2 short stories, both to the best of my ability, and I haven’t had a single idea that I’m willing to take on. Oh well, I guess we’ll just have to keep going.

    Soph 🙂
    p.s lovely to hear from you.

  2. October 26, 2011 / 2:15 am

    I hope your laptop is fixed soon! Sharing anything, especially laptops is horrible! D:!

    Having the writer’s block is horrible! What you need is inspiration and motivation to get back to writing! If you lost all of the work you do, there’s not much of a hope to recover them! Don’t linger on the past and get with the present to make your future!

    Don’t let anything stop you from being who you are. Work your way through, girl! D:! Apparently, everyone has to take public speaking in college/university. I would love to take part of it, because I love to speak. But apparently, I have this brain disorder where I repeat things out of nowhere -__-!

    Some people have issues with just going out to talk in front of a lot of people! There’s not much anyone else can do besides give motivation. Don’t think about your self-consciousness and push on with it.

    I think I did alright in the ACT. I don’t expect much since I bs’d the last remaining questions of the science parts :(!

    What I’m confused is… What if you’re like squatting and the… Human “extracts” misses the hole? Sorry for being so… Contraversial. It’s just something interestingly questionable to just… overly think of :P.

    Take care(:

  3. October 28, 2011 / 4:32 pm

    Haha. Sennheiser, Audio Technica, Dr Dre do sells earphones. In fact, Dr Dre is famous for its earphones. I have seen many youngsters wearing it on the subway. Haha.

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